As I drove very slowly through the snow on my way to work, I was worried I was going to miss the start of Dancing on Ice, but I made it… just! I was so glad I wasn’t delayed because diva extraordinaire, Bette Midler, flew in to sing her classic From a Distance, as Torvill and Dean once again performed a spectacular routine. How do they make it look so easy? Almost inspires me to get skates on and try it myself, but I have a feeling I may be more Todd Carty than Jane Torvill. Oh well, if this weather keeps up I may have no choice but to abandon my yellow Punto and skate home down the Clyde!
Phillip Schofield asked Bette Midler if she would like to take to the rink, to which she replied: “You wouldn’t catch me dead on ice!” Well you couldn’t be any worse than some of our celebs Bette.
This week’s compulsory move is the ‘one-footed change of edge sequence’. Oh dear, this already has disaster written all over it – I love it!
So first up was Jessica Taylor. I had high hopes for this Liberty X lovely but she hasn’t quite lived up to them, (oh no, I feel like Jason Gardiner) but perhaps tonight could be her night. In training she managed to give Pavel a nasty cut which, shall we say, was a little close to the bone. Tonight though she managed to get through the routine and scored an impressive 22 – her highest score of the series. Skating to Fred Astaire’s Cheek to Cheek she looked lovely, if a little ‘toilet dolly’ like in peach, and seemed to put more expression and life into this performance. Could she at last be a contender?
Next up, Donal MacIntyre. Skating to Black and Gold by Sam Sparro, he really impressed me tonight. He had life, energy and the Olympic Hydroplane or whatever it was called was blooming impressive. He scored 17.0 which is his best score so far, but I have to say, I think it was a little low. Maybe it’s my untrained eye but was Jessica really that much better? I didn’t think so but then I am maybe just a slightly obsessed DOI fan!
Roxanne Pallet was next to take to the rink. Skating to Alexandra Burke’s version of Hallelujah, Roxy had everything to prove after her recent spats with Mr Gardiner. From the training clips, we knew she was going to perform the dreaded Headbanger and when the move came up I had to watch with my hands over my eyes. She only scored 17 and Jason was once again rude. He said: “Hallelujah that’s over. I never look forward to your performance; it’s like going to the dentist.” Ok, her feet were in the wrong place to complete the proper bounce of the Headbanger, but my word, she appeared to do so well and I have to agree with her when she said to Jason: “Next time you go to the dentist can they take all your teeth out please.” I would have added “with pliers”, but there you go. The judges are super harsh tonight!
Ellery Hanley skated next. Performing to disco classic, Boogie Wonderland, by Earth, Wind and Fire with The Emotions, Ellery seemed to have found a little more rhythm. Although partner Frankie said that the routine was very technical, Ellery seemed a little stiff and it wasn’t the most exciting skate of the night. He scored 15 which I think may put him on a shaky peg, but in this competition, you never know.
It was time for ‘legally blonde’ next, Zoe Salmon. Zoe appears to have improved week on week and tonight she gave a really polished performance. This was reflected in her score of 22 and Robin Cousins said: “it was lovely to watch.” I am sure her former Blue Peter colleagues and Chris from Hollyoaks (yes, the one who wears a dress in the soap and who Zoe is rumoured to be dating) thought the same. With her perma- grin I think she may be morphing into an elongated Melinda, but it seems to be working.
Next, it was time to brace myself. Something I like to call TCT - Todd Carty time, is the highlight of my week (ok, maybe I should get a life). Skating to beautiful song Smile, by Nat King Cole, this was supposed to be Todd’s attempt at moving away from comedy. Did it work? Well, considering he spent the first half of the skate practically static with some bizarre facial movements, then the second half wobbling, I’m not sure, but he did manage to stay upright, just! Desperate to get a score of ten – worrying that that’s what he aspires too – Todd scored just 8.5, although he did add: “I’ll take anything I can get!”
Whilst Karen Barber said: “Todd there’s improvement”, Jason made the statement of the evening saying: “I gave you 1.5 cause your performance is endearing but… it was like Tinkerbell. Your performance was stationary.” Poor Todd could really do with some fairy dust.
We saw Melinda Messenger train with girl-band of the moment, The Saturdays, this week. The sexy songstresses showed Melinda some funky moves but after a stumble during her performance, the yummy mummy seemed to lose her confidence and struggled to get it back. Nicky said: “you looked a little tense”. No wonder Nicky, she missed out on her favourite move, the cartwheel, and must be feeling the dreaded Skate Off looming, again!
From one magical mum to another, Coleen Nolan was next to lace up her boots. In her training video we saw that Coleen had had a terrible week, crying and almost walking out of the show when she struggled to pick up the routine. But she appeared to get over the nerves and took to the ice with a smile, and a ridiculous looking ponytail! She was probably terrified that the hair piece would fly off during the performance but it didn’t, and actually her skate to Can’t Fight the Moonlight by LeAnne Rimes was pretty impressive, even if her bottom did seem to be up in the air fir half of it! Phillip asked if she still wanted to leave and she said: I won’t walk out on you while I’m posing as a horse!” Her bubbly nature certainly shines through but her skating in getting up to scratch and Ruthie said “You’re starting to earn your place here.” Praise – I think? Bottoms up!
Final performance brings on a cliché, but it really was a case of saving the best till last. Last week Ray Quinn stumbled through his performance and lacked the confidence and style that he had executed in previous weeks. Well this week, he was back on top skating to Jamiriquai and giving a performance which puts him leagues beyond anyone else in the competition. He scored an outstanding 26.5, the highest score of the series so far, with 5.5 from not only Robin, but notorious low scorers Ruthie Henshall and Jason Gardiner! Karen Barber told Ray: “you’re back.” Jason said: “It’s called Dancing on Ice and dancing is what you do on ice, I loved it!” Wooo, is Ray really melting Mr Frosty’s heart? It appears so. He is also melting mine, he really is fantastic.
With that it was time for tea and a trip to sunnier climes with Wild at Heart – isn’t that that bird from Monarch of the Glen with those lions?
Back to the ice and a re-cap of the performances almost has me crying into my tea. Todd Carty, you are a legend and Ray, well you have become the stv office crush, you poor boy!
Is it just me or when Phillip starts the results part, do you feel nervous? Imagine how the celebs feel?
First through is Roxanne and she is delighted, wonder if Jason is? Next through is Ray and Maria (yay!) so that should keep Mr Gardiner happy. Melinda and Fred are next and she must be so relieved. Jessica and Pavel live to skate another week, Donal and Florentine go through too. Zoe did very well and rightly goes through. Down to Ellery, Coleen and Todd… and Coleen is safe!
Oh no, Todd is in danger of going out, Sunday night’s may never be the same again.
Can Ellery find his boogie? Well, he certainly gave it his all and seemed to feel he had found his rhythm.
Next up is Todd, I feel quite sick. Smile? I feel the tears coming.
Time for the judges. Karen saves Ellery, Nicky saves Ellery, Jason the same, Ruthie saves Todd? Ruthie?! But it isn’t enough and Robin saves Ellery, but it doesn’t matter. Todd is going home. I am gutted. Well, thank you Todd for brightening up my Sunday nights and you will be sadly missed. We are sure your boys will be proud of you, as are we. Todd finished by saying: “I’ll keep on skating and I love you all very much.” We love you too Todd. Off to get the hankies now! This is all too much for a Sunday evening.
